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2004-02-22 - 11:48 p.m. - adventure awaits Where to start???? Well, when we last left off, I was about to have a date – my first in epochs. Well, we went to see "In America" – great movie by the way…the two sisters in it are awesome, and then we had dessert at this place that has heavenly creations. We talked until almost 1 a.m., and right before we parted, (and I really did mean to tell him this earlier) I told him that I was in the process of applying for a teaching job overseas. He was very supportive of the idea and even said he wished he were in the type of profession that would allow him to do something overseas. No, we didn’t kiss – just hugged…he said he’s a bit old fashioned and likes to take things slow. I don’t know if that’s a cop-out for not wanting to kiss goodnight, but I was OK with it – I find him very interesting to talk with but am not smitten with him. He’s overcome a lot of obstacles in his life – abusive father, the drowning of an older brother whom he really looked up to, the suicide of his other brother whom he didn’t like at all since this brother had their father’s bad traits. He grew up in poverty and left school at 16. Long story short, he pulled himself up by the bootstraps and made a good life for himself – against all odds, I guess you could say. I really admire and respect him for that. We were suppose to go see a jazz film a couple of weeks later, but when I emailed him about the night, he said he had been working so much, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to go at all. And, that he was now seeing someone. WHAT????? It seemed to be a bit out of the blue, but then again, so was my "oh, by the way, I’m hoping to be working overseas next year." I didn’t feel crushed but I guess my ego was a bit bruised – probably more due to the loss of any potential of pursuing a relationship. But if the shoes were reversed, I probably would have written him off as well. Perhaps I should take it as a compliment and see it as his confidence in me obtaining employment overseas next year despite the high competition for jobs. Speaking of which, my conference is this Thursday. It has certainly come quickly, and I’m excited to go down to San Francisco for a few days. I’ve already been in email contact with two school administrators (or at least the person in charge of hiring). One person from a school in Maturin, Venezuela is interested in talking with me, and another from Gran Canaria – the biggest island of the Canary Islands, Spain wishes to speak with me as well. The Canary Islands are suppose to have some of the clearest skies on the planet…hmmm…but in Venezuela I might be able to save more money (which I need to do since I won’t be able to rent my house out for the total amount I pay for in mortgage, taxes and insurance. Plus, I have to pay a property manager and yard maintenance people.) Then again, I do have some savings that I could devote to the house. I also plan on opening up a line of credit to use in an emergency. Nevertheless, I better not count my chickens before they hatch – I don’t have a job yet at either place – just interviews. But the fact that I have two interviews even before setting foot in San Fran is cause for excitement. And I have to keep reminding myself that I do have a lot to offer. I must throw away my modesty and sell myself down there – I’m better than any other person who will walk through that door. It just feels so out of character for me, but if I’m not aggressive, I might as well say that I’ll be in the Great Northwest yet again next year. Not that it’s a bad thing by any means, but my middle name is adventure, and I’m overdue for one…
30-something - 2005-03-01
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